I don’t usually do rap, but…

this is worthy of making an exception!;

UPDATE: Brian Coughlan posted the lyrics over on Pharyngula :

My name is D to the I to C to the K, Yeah I’m the Dickie D,
I gots my Ph.D and comin’ your way on the youtube to bust your world view
so just listen to me and don’t you argue.

You see, this battle’s been ragin’ since Zeus was on the bottle,
between Science like Democritus and Faith like Aristotle,
who said the mover wasn’t movin’ like some magic trick
but that’s no good logic,
my posse is far too quick
for this religious schtick.

Cos science is the only way to know y’all,
you stand with me y’all,
or you can fall y’all
so go ahead and take your pick.

ES: Yeah you tell him Rick …
Darwin : Cos if you don’t know me …

RD: YOU DON’T KNOW DICK!!

Chorus : Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!
Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!

SH:On the shoulders of midgets we built up this machine,
DD:YEAH!!!
RD:Silence that watch… Paley
Growing stronger and harder almost daily, storming Wilber- by -force
as we framed the discourse
until the science split in schismatic divorce,
then Darwin took to the seas to see what no one had seen,
and ever since then we’ve been increasingly keen,
they may never adore us,
but they’ll no longer ignore us,
give it to ’em PZ hit these BLEEP with the chorus!!!

Chorus : Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!
Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s still smarter than you he studied biology!

Then there was Darrow dukin’ it out with the straight and the narrow
a ragin’ bull in the ring,
he did his thing,
and took it on the chin like he was Bobby de Niro.
We might have lost at Scopes,
beaten down by the dopes,
and the stooges of popes,
but in losin’ we coped,
becomin’ more than we hoped,
creationists slipped on the soap
of their own slippery slope,
what was impossible, improbable,
is now wholly unstoppable ….
the creationist foldup you hate us talking bull, don’t you know that this Dick BLEEP frickin’ unblockable …

Chorus : Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!
Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s still smarter than you he studied biology!

Now the machine of our making,
sees culture ripe for the taking
Cos I’m the rapper thats rappin the ….
unlike the Catholic, Muslim or even the Jew, b
elieves that no God but science could ever be true,
hell if I was dyslexic I’d even hate “dog” too.

Time to open your eyes,
get yourself wise,
the age of science has arised
to be religions demise,
and while you turkeys all cry,
shouting why God oh why,
I’ll still be poppin’ my collar
earning my dollars
in Allah.

Chorus : Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!
Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s still smarter than you he studied biology!

Chorus : Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s smarter than you he’s got a science degree!
Yeah he’s the Dick to the Doc to the Ph.D,
he’s still smarter than you he studied biology!

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~ by B.T. Murtagh on March 29, 2008.

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